Happy Thanksgiving, While it's Still Legal

"If the anti-Christmas forces are winning, then the war in Iraq is nothing short of total victory."
~Ruth Marcus in The Washington Post


On Wednesday, November 26th, 2008, the day before Thanksgiving, I saw the following on the way to my parent's house:

• An aisle at Wallgreens full of Christmas lights, decorations, dancing Santas, and Christmas candy. The aisle was stocked on November 1st, before the Halloween candy even had time to cool.
• A department store display full of stylized Christmas trees and skimpy red and green outfits for women.
• Three Salvation Army bell ringers, also in red and green.
• Tinsel and a "Merry Christmas" sign at a Dunkin Donuts.
• A street performer playing Deck the Halls on a fiddle.
  

I did not see any of the following:

• A "Happy Thanksgiving" sign.
• A turkey, or even a stylized depiction of one.
• A "Happy Thanksgiving" Hallmark card.
  

My friends, the War on Thanksgiving is upon us! Bill O'Riley proves that it's all part of the regressive sectarian agenda to get secular holidays out of the public square in order to marginalize secular humanism. Just look at what happened with the Taliban in Afghanistan: once you get secular humanism out of the way, then you can pass regressive sectarian programs like arranged marriages, the criminalization of contraception, forced domesticity on women, the legalization of hate crimes, and the rise of violent turf battles between murderous egotistical dudes who formed rival denominations.

Or maybe the retail tentacle of the megatheocorporatocracy is desperate for some rampant shallow consumerism after the economy imploded, and Bill O'Riley is a deluded priggish asshole. [1]


Happy T-Day everyone, enjoy it while it lasts. ;-)



[1] This is the proper use of the word priggish (see the definition).

Copyright November 2008 by F*ck M*sculinity